Friday 8 February 2013

Three Ways to Keep a Cool Head


A large number of people come to coaching hoping to lose the gnaw of anxiety that they feel most of the time.  I am coming to the opinion that it is unrealistic to expect to lose all sense of anxiety.  This is an attendant part of being human; we succeeded in the evolutionary stakes because we scan our environment for possible threats.  We are constantly on guard.  It’s how we are made.
Now armed with a more realistic (and less stressful) expectation, the question becomes how can we live more comfortably with our anxiety, how can we feel less distress?
1. Underneath your anxiety there is a little nagging voice  Listen carefully and you will hear it.  You can recognize it by the ‘should’ implied in every nag.  You should be spending more time with the kids, you should be higher up the corporate ladder, this goes on endlessly for many of us.  Recognise the voice and challenge it, reassure it and ultimately turn a blind ear (sic).
2. Having made some more space in your mind, fill it with more useful, less stressful thoughts.  It may sound odd, but put yourself back in the centre of your life.  Ask yourself, what is it that you want, you believe, you think, you value?  Spend time rediscovering what is important to you.  Armed with greater self-knowledge, and a stronger sense of who you are, it gradually becomes easier to resist the auto-stress reaction when others try to crowd you with their shoulds.
3. I know, I know, everyone is talking about the value of meditation.  It seems that modern science is backing up ancient wisdom.  Clearing the mind, calming the system for a few minutes a day has profound beneficial effects on reducing automatic stress reactions, and bringing them under your control.  Sounds like it’s worth the time doesn’t it?
Let me know your stress-busting techniques.  And get in touch if you think coaching might be worth investigating.
Have a peaceful weekend.
The greatest weapon against stress is our ability to choose one thought over another.

William James

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